How to take care of your deployed spouse

How to take care of your deployed spouse

This is a huge necessity

No matter how bad you are feeling, your spouse is probably feeling worse. They are in a deployed location with no family around and not living at home. They are missing their family, own bed and regular food. Be there for them as much as you can. While you need to take care of yourself and your family, don't forget to take care of your spouse. It will be tough to do this for spouses that are new to this kind of lifestyle, but you may need to press pause on your own stress in order to make sure they are functioning properly. 

Make them a nice homemade meal before they leave: Or go out to eat at their favorite restaurant. They won't have that food for awhile so they will appreciate it. You could also make their favorite baked goof to take with them and to share with their buddies on the trip over to their deployed location. 

Pack a letter in their bag they are deploying with: When they find it this will be a nice little surprise for them. They will feel happy that you thought of them before they left and thought ahead enough to do that for them. It doesn't have to be long, just something to make them smile. 

Start getting a care package together as soon as possible: It take about 2-3 weeks to get to foreign countries so get everything together for a care package before you even know their address. Make sure you know what the country their deploying to does not allow because your package will be going through customs and most Middle East locations do not allow alcohol and other items. Think of the snacks they like(beef jerky, nuts, candy), specific drinks they like (gatorades, sweet teas, coffees), certain sauces they love to use at home etc. I've sent my husband Buffalo wild wings sauces and Chick-fil-A sauce before just to give him a little more flavor with the foods they get. Any water flavorings such as MIOs are nice as well to get a change of flavor. They may enjoy a note or painting from your kids. You could try to make something homemade like cookies, but this is usually better to send with them on their way to their deployed location since it takes so long for your package to get there. 

Be there for them: Just be there for them whenever they can talk. Try to focus all attention on them when they are able to call because you never know when the next call will be. Be supportive of what they are talking about and realize they may not be able to tell you everything they are doing due to security issues. Leave your phone on ring at all times so that you won't miss their call.

Ask them how they are feeling: They are going through the most out of everyone so try to get them to talk about their feelings. Sometimes this may be hard but eventually they will start getting into their own routine as well just like you will. 

Post on social media: Don't post their exact location or details of what they are doing, but post about them. It will remind them that you are thinking of them while they're away. My husband has missed Father's Day with Jax every year because of deployments so I post a Father's Day post every year and say how much we're missing him and how much of a great day he is.

Pray for them: Prayers never hurt if you believe in that, so make sure to say a prayer for them every once in awhile.